Lately With These Leavitt's :

-I can't believe it but I finally got my new camera I have been drooling over for years. The Canon Mark III, I also got an L series 24-70mm lens with it. And I have never felt more in control during photo sessions. I have done two shoots with the new stuff and am so so happy with the results. I feel like a true professional now!! Totally worth the major money splurge. It really helped when I sold my old camera with lenses, and my light and light stand. I shipped that to Kentucky! But, it was worth it all. I have been doing lots of photo shoots and it is so fun.
-Askeroth family changes, Kylee is at the hospital right now having her third baby that is a girl. Penelope June Dowse will arrive soon. Happy for her but baby stuff is always a bit bitter sweet for me right now. And my sister in law Tiffany is expecting. Bittersweet once again. She just told everyone today on FB.  I can document that we were both seeing the same doc for infertility and both on our second round of Femara. She conceived I did not. We would have been due a few days apart if it would have happened to me too. The month after that is when I got on Clomid and went to the hospital. Right now I have been taking an emotional break but still trying and taking Fertility herbs. I am not documenting this stuff to make any of my family feel bad. Just for my posterity to read in the future.
-We are still trying to figure out our house plans for sure. Many, many, hard decisions but we have one to go off of. Now.
-This just in....Lyla now refuses to go to sleep both of my girls do. Which turns me into an ugly "Go To Bed Beast!!". I need to go repent for the yelling. And find a better solution. Being a parent is the toughest job in the world.
-I think I will be spending this whole week editing. Here I go now....Goodbye...

Lately:

1) Evelyn asks almost every night when I put her to bed when I am going to have a baby boy. Holding back the tears I tell her that if our Heavenly Father wants us to have another baby...even a baby boy than it will happen. I also told her I didn't know if it was going to happen. (those moments are pretty hard)
2) I am currently taking natural fertility pills up the wazoo to see if that does anything. Feeling water logged...ha ha.
3) Trent's is working different hours at work. They are sometimes hard...sometimes ok.
4) Lyla says lots of words skipping the second letter. Thing=Sing, Skirt=Sirt, Shop=Sop many more I can't think of right now. I hope she never stops doing it. I love love it so much.
5)Three things I am currently craving/drooling over in my life:
A) Being pregnant, and having a baby bump, feel the baby move, and add to our family. Someday perhaps....
B) Building our house. Figuring it all out. Actually getting started on the whole ordeal, and being able to save for it. After the parade of homes, we found a house/floorplan we love love love!! Just making it work for us and making it much much smaller. These tight quarters and my laundry room in the garage are really starting to get to me...ya know? Maybe you don't if you have an awesome house with actual closets and space. Someday perhaps...
C) A new camera for my photography. I know it is time to upgrade and improve. I feel like I am behind and I truly hate it. It doesn't help that the new Canon Mark III 5D costs $3,000 either. I am currently trying to sell, sell, sell. And save from my photoshoots and all. Someday perhaps...
6) I have recently changed my Pure Bliss Photography name to Whirly Pear Photography. My friend Lindsey who is basically family designed my new logo for me and she is pretty dang amazing!! I spend all week designing my website and it was so tedious but very worth the time and effort.
7) Young Women's is going so great. I am really beginning to love my girls so much. They are so sweet and we have a great organization.

Sums it up right now...

   For some reason this Demi Lovato song sums up how I feel about infertility right now. I just had to post for my posterity.                                


                                    See you calling again

I don't wanna pick up, no, oh
I've been laying in bed
Probably thinking too much, oh, oh

Sorry I'm not sorry for the times
I don't reply, you know the reason why

Maybe you shouldn't come back
Maybe you shouldn't come back to me
Tired of being so sad,
Tired of getting so mad, baby
Stop right now,
You'll only let me down, oh, oh
Maybe you shouldn't come back
Maybe you shouldn't come back to me

Trying not to forget,
Should be easier than this oh, oh
And all the birthdays you've missed
I was only a kid oh, oh

Sorry I'm not sorry for the times
I don't reply, you know the reason why

Maybe you shouldn't come back
Maybe you shouldn't come back to me
Tired of being so sad,
Tired of getting so mad, baby
Stop right now,
You'll only let me down, oh, oh
Maybe you shouldn't come back
Maybe you shouldn't come back to me
To me

Sorry I'm not sorry for the times

Maybe you shouldn't come back
Maybe you shouldn't come back to me
Tired of being so sad,
I'm tired of getting so mad, baby
Stop right now,
You'll only let me down, oh, oh
Maybe you shouldn't come back
Maybe you shouldn't come back to me
Maybe you shouldn't come back to me